I have a friend- a very dear one who has been contemplating a divorce from her husband of about 20 years. There are many issues and divorce seems to be the only option left. There is no respect, no communication, no intimacy. They have been living and parenting separately under the same roof for years- she sought attention outside the marriage and he immersed himself in projects around the house. She cried to him, read all the self help books and begged him to go to counseling. Finally, one day she decided it was enough and after years of contemplating she is taking steps towards regaining herself back and starting a new path without him.


On Friday night, she and I went to the Cobb to see what movie every other female that night was seeing, "Eat, Pray, Love." Women, solo, couples and in groups filled the theatre, we waved as we saw other friends we knew. As we watched the movie I would lovingly poke her arm as a scene or some part of the dialogue mirrored what she was going through at the current time. There were moments when we both cried, not only for the character's pain- but for my friends pain as well. I locked my arm in hers whispering in her ear ,"This is only so I can "poke" you better", but the real reason was I wanted her to know I was there for her, and that she was okay and that she was safe.

The movie talked about forgiving yourself, loving yourself so that you can love others, and not to settle for anything less than what your heart dreams for.

This morning when she stopped by for her early morning visit (before I leave for work and before she walks the lake) she read me an email she wrote to another friend that touched my heart. She has allowed me to share this email. It is personal, it is sad, it is real. It is a life revealed through heartache, a life in transition, and being transformed. This could be your your life, your friend's life.

Keeping our pain close to our heart, alienates us from those around us. It keeps us in the dark, struggling to deal with it on our own. By letting those that love us "know" of our heartaches and our pain, by bringing it out into the light we allows ourselves to heal, to forgive, to move on, and to love again..

"Hi

I ask you overlook any misspelling..I am typing on my phone...

For the most part, I had a really good weekend.

Saw "eat, pray, love" on Friday night...it left me inspired and encouraged as there were many parallel's to my
life. It's definitely a chick flick...you could tell from the looks on
the few men that attended, they were there against their will and better
judgement....LOL

Started a new case Friday night...the first night is always challenging...but it is a good case...a cake walk
really...and I will be able to rest...

I slept on and off on Sat. I never sleep more than an hr or two at a time it seems...

Went to church Sat evening. The pastor spoke on the feeding of the 5000...and, as always, was thinking outside the box...he took a "new" angle...rather than Christ
performing this great miracle FOR the crowd...what if people, upon
viewing the young boy willing to give all he had (2 fish and 3 loaves),
opened their hearts and shared what was available until everyone was
filled...and no one went hungry.

What I conveyed to him afterward is this...
There is a unique phenomena that happens when we do something, anything,
for another. The brain releases serotonin...a happy, feel good
hormone... not only is serotonin released in the recipient, but also the
giver...and anyone else who happens to observe such an exchange also
experiences a serotonin release...

So, maybe the real miracle is that 5000+ people gained the valuable lesson of giving and sharing..."paying it forward" Jesus style...

Spent this morning with a friend...coffee on her 9th floor porch...overlooking one of the many area lakes. She is always
insightful and encouraging. Having lived 75 yrs...and working in the
real estate and brokering arena's tends to do lend itself to much
wisdom!

Came home and worked on some neglected projects...and then the "fun" began...

My husband asked for his ATM card back...which lead to a discussion on money and spending...and accountability...he became increasingly
defensive...and talked about how. He was raising the kids while I was
screwing the whole ARMY...I responded with how he was in love with
someone else when we married and for the first 12 years we were
together...not one of my finer moments. I was left numb...and in the
end, in his always silent way, he handed me a list of the bills and I
kept the ATM.

In all the years we have been together, I always upheld him and was always impressed by the way he never threw my past in my face,seeming so
willing to forgive...until today...I think this is what shocked and
left me so numb. Realizing it was all for not and in reality, he never
forgave my choices...

I took off my wedding ring. I wanted to wait until we had told the kids...but what's done is done...

Tomorrow, I go to the bank and take him off my acct...

A few months ago he suggested that he move our 5th wheel over to the lake house and live there. I think I am going to encourage him to do
this. I need to have some peace where I am...to be able to make that
bachelor pad livable for me and the boys until the lake house is
ready...

Anyway...hope you had a restful weekend...

Ciao for now"